Airports Confuse the Hell out of Me

Is it really just me or does the protocol at airports confuse the hell out of everyone else too? I'm not a frequent flyer by any means, but I'd say I fly between two and four times a year on average. If you read the My Life: In Countdowns post, you'll know that I was recently in Calgary. I flew in from Winnipeg.

Despite the fact that the machine required one of the airport employees to hold my passport under the scanner in order for me to get my baggage tags, at least I knew that I only need my i.d. at that point. Once that step was finished, the confusion began. Does the airport staff member at the check-in desk require just my i.d. or does she need my boarding pass too? Boarding pass, yes, i.d., no. Speaking of boarding passes, this was the first time I've traveled with an electronic boarding pass in my phone. When they manage to create something so that government issued i.d. can be contained within my smart phone, I will be in heaven. Both things, one place, no confusion.

So after check in it’s time for security and everything goes in the buckets. Then they ask for your passport and your boarding pass? So I dig through the bucket to find my passport and I dig through the bucket to find my phone a.k.a. boarding pass. After the dreaded walk through the scanners comes the worst part of the whole process (that is unless you’re one of the lucky ones who gets taken to one of those little rooms), collecting all of your stuff and putting it all back in order in a timely enough fashion to not hold up the whole line.

Next up, a bit of a wait in the incredibly uncomfortable airport chairs and then it’s time to board. Enter another scene that absolutely baffles me. Everyone except for people like me lines up in a colossal line to … stand in line and then sit in their assigned airplane seat for more time than they absolutely need to. If the seats in the airport are uncomfortable, the seats in the airplane are the epitome of discomfort. Why people rush to first, stand in a long ass line and second, sit in awfully cramped, discomfort, will never cease to baffle me.

Once the line is all but the length of about ten people, I get up and prepare to be confused once again. Boarding pass and passport, right? 

Now it’s time to head down the enclosed, somewhat claustrophobic, walk way to the last place of confusion where I have to figure out if the flight attendant needs to see my i.d. and/or my boarding pass. And the answer is…boarding pass.

Done. Finally. Passport away. Phone on airplane mode. Sit back and … relax? Not really.

What baffles you most about airports? Do you have any crazy airport/airplane stories to share?