Sunday, May 12, 2013

What Did JACK Ever Do To You?

Ya, so 'J' day was yesterday in The ABC's of Swearing, but Starr is, well, her namesake (a fucking rock star, I mean) and there are no rules in her challenge so I am posting for 'J' today.

So answer me, dammit, what did Jack ever do to you?

Jack shit
Jack off
Jack and Jill (ok, not that one, but really, where did Jill end up in all of this vulgarity? Is it because Jack fell down the hill? Is that why no one likes him?)

Have I ever mentioned that I love Urban Dictionary? Here's why:
"Jack Shit: Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Knee-deep Schitt, Inc. Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and they had 6 children: Holie Schitt, The twins: Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Give Schitt, and Bull Schitt. Jack and Noe divorced. Noe later married Mr. Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they had Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Give Schitt married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg, Byrd, and Horse. Bull Schitt left home to tour the world. He recently returned with his new bride, Pisa."

The next time someone tells you, "You don't know Jack shit,'" answer with this. Imagine the look on their face!

While we're on the topic of words and phrases that include the word 'Jack', I must share with you one of the most disgusting acts of vulgarity I have seen in my life. I was attending a Motor Cross competition a few years ago and on the rear window of a red jacked up half tonne truck was a decal that read, "Jacked up cuz fat chicks can't jump." I don't think I'll ever forget that as long as I live. I hope those guys drive their truck into a pit of shit and get stuck there for a few hours days. Jackasses!


  1. THere are several rhymes and jokes that insinuate Jill is a strumpet, a whore, a male...

    eg Jack and Jill went up the hill
    each had a buck and a quarter...
    Jill came down with 2.50

  2. There was this computer game called "You Don't Know Jack." I loved it. It was a comedy quiz game; can't find it anymore.

  3. Why does this picture of this donkey amuse me so?

  4. Hee Hee Jack shit and Jack ass are two very good words!